You Say

I'm watching "Serial Killing 101", for no other reason than Lisa Loeb is in it, and she's a stone fox. Yeah, she's wearing the glasses.

On Future Propulsive Fuel

This Saturday morning's breakfast beginner recipe: Chorizo & Egg Tacos.

Ingredients:

• 4 eggs


• 2 links chorizo


• 2 huge tortillas, herb & garlic flavored

Instructions:

Cook the chorizo. I don't know if there's a shorter way to explain this, but what you do is, squirt the chorizo out of its little sausage thingy onto a skillet or whatever they're called. The thing you make hamburgers on/with. Then you apply heat until it's well above room temperature. Add cayenne and/or garlic to taste. I add cayenne and garlic to everything.

In fact, the cayenne just wasn't providing all the power I wanted so I got my dad the Spice Baron to hook me up with "the deadliest thing you have." He (seriously) made me listen to a safety lecture before he would hand me the bottles of "raw material." Nothing his company sells, just an ingredient. And the ingredient is the very essence of cayenne (fine ground red pepper, dumbasses), oleoresin capsicum, aka pepper spray. I've used it twice because the safety precautions are kind of a pain--gotta keep vegetable oil around in case you get this stuff on your skin, gotta seal the bottle back up when you use it, and damned if I can find a safe dosage. I dropped one little drop onto a hot skillet or whatever it's called, and it immediately vaporized and hit me full in the face. I was only incapacitated for a couple of seconds, but I've been terrified of it ever since. I think it raises my internal body temperature a few degrees too. In short, not a good ingredient for the summer months. I think I need an eyedropper for it, too.

Where was I? Okay. You've got the chorizo cooked. Drain the oil if there's a lot of it, otherwise it's just more tasty chorizo goodness. Then drop all the eggs in there and scramble them around in the meat. And scoot 'em around on the skillet until they're all cooked and everything. Then I guess turn the stove down to warm or whatever.

Hopefully by this point you've got some warm tortillas, "burrito" or "wrap" sized. For fellow Aggies, this is the "Regular" Freebird's tortilla size. You need two. Warm or whatever, just make sure they're flexible. Dole out the biomass into the tortilas and voila, chorizo and egg tacos.

By the way, this may cause some gas. Maybe heartburn too, if you've got a weak composition.

More Unwarranted Pooh-Criticism

Follow the link, read, then come back.

Done?

Here's the money shot: "Feeling of cold + No perspiration + Fatigue = I drink too much diet coke and not enough water!"

And his conclusion: "...it reminded me that I am currently living in a desert and that I'm not impervious to the elements."

Hunh. So he nearly had to do the heatstroke thing to figure that out. Let's see if I can garner any clues from Lt. Dan's regular missives (memories thereof, of course)...

Sand all over the place.
Sand fleas all over the place.
Hot during the day, cold at night.
IN IRAQ.
Pooh's wife not around.

What do you know? He has been in a desert! I'll be damned.

Reader E-Mail

I was the recipient of the following string of IM text from my dear friend The Pooh-Bear, who posts at An American Bear in Iraq:

Pooh Bear: I'm about to head to bed, but I thought I'd tell you I liked your recognition of Thrall, Thorndale, Rockdale....the Hwy 79 gauntlet
Pooh Bear: My mom is actually looking into a job in Rockdale...so that nice little town may be home soon for my parents...
Pooh Bear: If you ever get the chance to stay in Rockdale for no good reason...the Rainbow Inn is the coolest little motel/inn
Pooh Bear: Okay...I will hunt you down later...
Pooh Bear: pooh out.

What a fag.

I think he had to stop at that place because in his senior year he had sleep apnea and couldn't drive the 2 hours from College Station to Puh-Flugerville without stopping.

I'm not sure why they call it the Hwy 79 gauntlet. I didn't see too many speed traps, not like the one I hit in Shavano Park back in March. In Shavano Park the cops travel in pairs, up and down NW Military Hwy. Speeding drivers beware!

However, they have excellent service at the courthouse and people are now able to take Defensive Driving online. The last time I got a moving violation, in high school, I had to actually drive from Whererupeisfrom to San Antonio and sit IN a classroom for 6-8 hours. The online thing is much more convenient.

I did mine at DefensiveDriving.com (no link because no $$$, yo!), was startled to find that the judge near and dear to every Aggie's heart, Judge Boyett, did the introduction video. And Judge Boyett was wearing makeup.